We spent Easter weekend with Todd’s parents in Western North Carolina, just south of Asheville. We mostly sat around, ate, drank and gained five pounds. (Thanks, charcuterie and chardonnay!) I finished The Anxious Generation on the flight home, just in time to return to reality and everything it made me want to change.

This weekend is stacked: Todd and I are heading to see Xanadu at Uptown Players Friday evening, both kids have prom Saturday night (yes, both!), we’ve got a fundraiser that same night for their old school, and on Sunday we’re doing a round-trip day drive to Austin for Claire’s roller derby bout. If you see me on Monday with bags under my eyes and a caffeine IV, just know I earned all of it!

Ask Me Anything

Your Question: "What's your favorite self-tanner?"

A reader asked me that last week, and I love y’all for knowing that I don't just wake up like this! My current fave is from a Canadian brand called Salty Face. You just spritz a bit onto a soft brush and sweep it across your face before bed. It gives a glow that says “sun-kissed,” not “overcooked.” No weird burnt-hair smell, either! I’m also dabbling with their tanning foam for my body. Early review: I love it!

​saltyface.com​

Modern Parenting

Free Programs To Keep Kids Off Screens (& Off My Nerves)

I’m already preemptively exhausted by the idea of entertaining teens for three solid months, so I’ve rounded up some solid free or low-cost summer activities:

• Kids Bowl Free – Sign up and kids 15 and under can bowl daily for free all summer. Bonus: there's an option to add a Family Pass, so parents, older siblings, grandparents and babysitters can join the fun too. kidsbowlfree.com​
• Every Kid Outdoors – Current 4th graders get free entry to all U.S. National Parks, and it covers the whole family. We used this for Mason years ago, and it ended up saving us a surprising amount of money on our RV travels. I think the first place we used it was Great Sand Dunes National Park in Colorado. It’s a government perk that really works! everykidoutdoors.gov​
• Dallas Teen Pass – The City of Dallas' All Access Teen Pass returns July 1–Aug 31 for free admission to local rec centers, pools, museums, rollerskating rinks and more. dallasparks.org​

Also—and this is important—Claire and Mason are both getting summer jobs this year. It's not optional. It's not negotiable. We’re not raising adult children who don’t know how to show up on time, take direction or scoop ice cream like a pro.

Since they’ll both have driver’s licenses soon, they’re also about to become our official errand runners. Need more printer ink? Out of eggs? Someone left their water bottle behind again? Congrats, teens—it’s your turn.

Good To Know

Free Narcan. Because Being Prepared Isn't Overreacting.

It’s heartbreaking that we even have to say this, but having Narcan on hand can literally save a life. I keep some at our house. You can order it for free if you live in Texas—it ships straight to your door. Order here.​

If you’re in another state, Google “Free Narcan [Your State]” and see what’s available. It’s the kind of thing you hope you’ll never need, but if you do, you’ll be glad you have it.

Sh!t Cooper Says

"It takes a lot of work to keep this show on the air."

- Cooper Koch

That’s my go-to line when someone comments on how “refreshed” I look. Behind the scenes? 8-step skincare routine, a vitamin lineup that rivals a pharmacy, salon-color hair, a face full of neurotoxins and enough other products to fill a TSA bin. Some people wake up flawless. I wake up and clock in.

Bonus Quote: As Dolly Parton's character Truvy Jones says in Steel Magnolias,

One Last Thing

Snapped (by Karen, Not Me)

Last week, my friend Karen sent me the sweetest reply to Cooped Up, and then absolutely stole my heart with this photo of her freshly sheared alpacas. I hadn't laughed that hard in days. If you’re having a rough week, just remember: somewhere out there is an alpaca rocking a body wave and the confidence of a Studio 54 regular.

---

Thanks for reading another edition of Cooped Up! If you're loving it, forward it to a friend who might need a good laugh, a good resource or a reminder that summer break is coming for all of us. And don’t forget—you can always reply to this email to ask a question, share a thought or just say hi.

In case you missed last week’s edition, it was all about The Anxious Generation, the book that had me crying in Barnes & Noble and rage-reading on airplanes. I also shared how I’m trying to de-center my phone and the emotional rollercoaster of prom dress shopping. Catch up here!

YOU ARE LOVED!