Today's Cooped Up is going out a little later than normal. Here's why: I woke up this morning to a bunch of alerts from my credit monitoring service about a Capital One credit card application made in the wee hours of the night using my info. Had I not gotten the alert, I might not have known until the damage was done.

I have credit monitoring because after a data breach settlement, I was offered the service for free via one of those postcards we all get in the mail when it happens — you know, the postcards we all usually just throw away without reading. This time, I actually followed through, and I’m really glad I did.

If you haven’t already, set up free accounts with all three credit bureaus and immediately freeze your credit reports unless you have a compelling reason to leave them open. It takes just a few minutes and could save you a huge headache.

• ​Equifax Credit Freeze​
• ​Experian Credit Freeze​
• ​TransUnion Credit Freeze​

You have to do all three. And while you're at it, freeze your minor children's credit too. There's literally no reason theirs should be active.

(PS - this clearly wasn't in my plan for what to write about today, so if the rest of today's Cooped Up seems a little disjointed...well, it is!)

Mini Rant

Your Parent Is Dead. Love, Retail.

Is anyone else getting bombarded with emails asking if you’d like to “opt out” of Mother’s Day and Father’s Day messages? I get the intention. But when every single brand you've ever had a passing relationship with starts sending some version of “Hey, just checking—are you grieving this year?” it becomes less thoughtful and more... emotionally spammy.

I’d rather get 20 emails celebrating parents than 20 that feel like a cheerful reminder that one of mine is gone. It’s like the brands are saying, “We know you’re probably sad. But it’s because we care. And we’d also like you to buy this cute bag.”

Tell me what you think!

What do you think about the "Wanna skip Mother's/Father's Day" emails? I think they're a sweet idea, even if it's become a grief parade. Just stop it. I'd rather get a discount code than a death reminder.

Ask Me Anything

Do You Whiten Your Teeth at Home?

A longtime Cooped Up fan wondered that, and I'm here to say "Yes, I do." If you've been around a while, you know that I’m an advocate for low-maintenance, easy-to-find routines, especially when they let me avoid appointments. Keeping my pearly whites pearly white falls squarely in that category. Once a week, I just pop on a Crest White Strip for about 45 minutes and go about my business. No dentist chair or weird blue lights required.

A Little Fix That Made A Big Difference

I Upgraded My Car's Cabin Air Filter & You Should Too

This might be the least sexy but most satisfying thing I’ve done in a while: I swapped the cabin air filter in my car for a HEPA one, and now I don’t have to drive through clouds of Eau de Weed when I'm sharing the road with Cheech & Chong. I ordered it online, and then when it arrived, I just Googled my make and model, found a how-to video and had it done in under a minute. Honestly, it took me longer to find the video than it did to actually do the swap.

I got the idea from the New York Times' Wirecutter column a few months ago. I bought mine from PureFlow, but depending on your make/model, you can get them from Bosch and other online retailers.

Turn It Up!

Release Me...Into This Wilson Phillips Spiral

Last week y’all loved the Janet Jackson throwback, so let’s keep the Gen X kitchen dance party going. This week’s song? Wilson Phillips, “Release Me.”

I was belting the chorus while loading the dishwasher like I was about to open for Celine in Vegas. Forgot how good that album is. (Apple Music, Spotify, YouTube Video)

Snapped

My Favorite MVP

Claire wrapped up her roller derby season in Waco this weekend and was named MVP Jammer by the opposing team. MVPs picked by your opponents hit a little different. Unfortunately, we’re going to miss the next couple of games because of high school finals and our Germany trip, but what a way to go out. (Rolling Rebellion is recruiting for future seasons, here's where you can find more details!)

Sh!t Cooper Says

"Fair & equal are rarely the same thing."

- Cooper Koch

I say this a lot—yes, to my kids, but honestly to just about anyone who needs reminding. We love to throw around the word “fair,” but true fairness isn’t always about giving everyone the exact same thing. Sometimes it’s about giving people what they actually need. And that’s rarely identical. Whether you’re raising kids, managing people or just being a human in relationships, equal treatment isn’t always the just treatment.

So no, you may not both get the same snack, the same curfew or the same vacation days. But you'll get what’s right. And that’s fair.

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That’s it for this week. Let me know what you think, and as always—hit reply, tell me what you loved (or didn’t) and forward this to someone who could use a better air filter, a credit freeze or a powerful singalong moment.

And in case you missed last week’s Cooped Up, it was all about slow cooker lasagna, prom night glamour and a driver's-seat dance party to Janet Jackson. If you missed it, catch up here.

YOU ARE LOVED!